Anti-PDF Propaganda
Next on our tour of Undertaker Books HQ, we have a very special room. Come on in, don’t be shy, and step over to this window. Down there, you’ll see Cyan has placed over a hundred needles at various locations in that man’s body. Some very interesting placement choices too; he’s getting very clever with this. Now, in his hands you’ll see a pair of clamps. He picks out two of the needles, attaches the clamps, then steps over to that switch and…
*faint screaming*
Nothing fatal, of course. That would mean paperwork and lawyers; it's just a nice buzz to get their attention.
Research? No, this isn’t our research department.
What did that man do? Well, he submitted a PDF during our last open call…
Okay, so Cyan doesn’t torture people who submit their stories to us as PDFs (though the idea has been discussed in staff meetings). But the point remains: if I asked my editor friends what the five biggest submission no-no's are, most of them would include “PDF files” somewhere on that list.
Why don’t editors like PDF files?
Because they’re a pain in the ass, that’s why!
Normally, this is the spot where I say I’m kidding, and apply some needed context.
Not today.
PDF files are a pain in the ass!
We can’t edit them. We can’t copy and paste from them. It’s just words on a screen that can’t be manipulated, accessed, or revised.
But DL, I hear you say. If you like the story, you can just email them back and ask for a word document…
To which I respond by repeating what you just said in a mocking tone of voice.
Yes, I *could.* But I probably won’t.
The number-one thing I strive to remind you in these blog posts is that editors are humans with all the trappings that come with our species. Among said trappings is annoyance when instructions aren’t followed. Our submission calls usually bring in more than a hundred entries. I don’t have the time or inclination to follow up with an author to get the file type I need when I’ve got another story that’s just as good from someone who followed instructions.
But what about file security? People want to protect their work!
You’re submitting from a Gmail or Yahoo server the government (ours, theirs, and a few alien ones we don’t know about yet) can already crack open any time they feel like it. A PDF is not the security system you think it is!
What? You want to borrow my soapbox? Okay, Cyan…
Seriously, folks. If a call asks for a Word document, that’s how you should submit your work. Submitting a PDF puts your story at a disadvantage (at best) if the editor doesn’t outright reject it. We’re not trying to be pains in your ass, but PDFs are definitely pains in ours. So do yourself a favor and submit the requested file type.
Wait, Cyan’s doing what with my soapbox? Holy hell! I didn’t know that was possible! Jeez, that doesn’t look pleasant, does it. I bet that guy submits a Word doc next time!